Monthly Archives: October 2016

‘Twenty-five cents, please’

Some readers possibly don’t realize that part of my alleged sense of humor comes from holding doors open for people, and as I do the honors, asking them for a quarter for my efforts.

PLEASE realize this is a joke. I ask for the 25-cent tip mainly to test their reaction and discover how quickly they’re able to think on their feet.

One such experiment (I’ve written about this before) happened a few years ago as I held the door for a man and his family as they entered the Santa Fe Souper Salad.

As the man, the last one to enter, walked past me, I put my hand out and spouted my usual “25 cents, please.”

Well, that must have gotten his pugilistic juices flowing, as he challenged me with something like, “I ought to punch you for doing that!” That would have been quite a sight: two chinless old men duking it out and missing half the time. Continue reading

No, I won’t chip in

No, I won’t chip in. In our household, we’re comfortable and expect to have a bit of spare change left over when Bonnie and I pass on. But for now, we won’t chip in.

During this fervid election season, I am firmly convinced, politicians would like to share in our inheritance, when that time comes — or sooner. Specifically in my laptop mailbox, I receive regularly tons of emails asking me to take part in a survey. About 80 percent of the items in my “in” box ask our opinion on the presidential candidates, Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, with a gratuitous mention of our own former Gov. Gary Johnson thrown in.

The questions are straightforward, but because “C” comes before “T” in the alphabet, some may infer a slight advantage for Hillary, as her name generally appears first.

I enjoy being quizzed on which one has a better plan, which one would be a disaster, which one won the latest debate.

Then, after asking a few demographic questions such as where I live, how many unchained dogs roam the streets of Las Vegas, how old I am, how much I earn, how many zoos are in my hometown and how I’m registered to vote, the questionnaire asks if I’d be willing to “chip in a dollar” to help the cause. Continue reading