It seemed that the whole town made elaborate preparations for the 4th of July festivities. Certainly not to be left out, my sisters must have spent weeks perfecting their fiesta dresses, those white, lacey outfits held together at the waist, tamale-style, with a metal belt.

A brain freeze prevented me from identifying that kind of belt, suitable only for parades, linked together with big silver ovals guaranteed to leave lasting impressions around the mid-section. My wife, Bonnie, quickly came up with the term “concha belt,” with the ease we might expect from one who wears such a belt year-round.

My three sisters, Dolores, Dorothy and Bingy regarded the 4th of July Parade as they would an Emperor’s Ball, so important was it to be spiffed up on that special day.

A nun at Immaculate Conception, I heard one of my sisters report, even gave the coeds pointers on how to look presentable for the big parade, without seeming cheap, gaudy or provocative. Continue reading →

This isn’t going to be a discourse on the “English Only” movement, which is gaining momentum in many areas. Expressing my opinions on the monolingual approach would take far more time and space than is available here.

But I once fell victim to a virulent e-mail forwarder from Deming. She sent to everyone in her address book a treatise by a congressman whose take on learning any language but English seemed — at least to me — bigoted. The politico’s dictum was: English is what is spoken in the U.S.; if you don’t like it, leave.

Yet, as I promised, that’s not what today’s column will be about. That’ll come later.

On what side of the argument do you fall? After many yÃ¥ears of teaching, I believe I’ve heard every argument for and against the learning of a language other than English. We’ve all heard about kids who were punished for speaking Spanish on the playground; and we’ve already memorized the litany of reasons for English only, the chief of which is that “The way to get ahead in the U.S. is through English.” Continue reading →

“Ha! Look how those people ahead of us spelled ‘potable.’”

“You’re far too critical. It’s still affluent water, no matter how you spell it,” my wife, Bonnie said, as we went for the fifth trip to haul effluent water from the city plant on 12th Street.

And if this seems like a commercial, well it is. We’re pleased with the service by those people who provide recycled water to legions of pickup-driving residents trying to save their lawns, bushes and trees.

Some of the city employees assigned to the water department will even climb up the back of our pickup, remove the cap from the tank and insert the large hose into the opening. Continue reading →

Do men give other men friendly butt pats? Of course they do, especially when on the field. Somehow, the baseball field seems to be the most popular butt-patting venue, but you see it on and in football fields, basketball courts and baseball stadiums, whether in or out.

But not in a courtroom.

Of course, I’m referring to the hand-to-posterior action of Chad Johnson, a former professional football player who thought he did the right thing in swatting his defense attorney’s behind. Johnson, who refers to himself as Ochocinco (Spanish for the numerals 8 and 5 that appear on his football jersey), was in court, on a charge of domestic violence.

Judge Kathleen McHugh was about to recite the terms of an agreement — no jail time, probation and community service — when she reminded Ochocinco of the help his attorney had provided. Surely, as a way of affirming the judge’s judgment, Ochocinco swatted the lawyer’s behind. Whacko! Continue reading →

A delayed Christmas present for our three grandchildren was the promise of a trip to a place called Hinkle’s Family Center in Albuquerque. Replete with bumper cars, bungee jumping, bumper boats, a racetrack and video games, Hinkle’s must have hosted all of the Duke City on Sunday.

We took Carly, Celina and my namesake, Arthur, our son Ben and his wife, Heather, to Hinkle’s, where, after an invigorating game of Laser Tag, the group settled for an afternoon of playing Ski-Bowl and shooting hoops. Ski-Bowl is like bowling, its object being to toss a wooden ball down a lane into various holes that award points according to the degree of difficulty.

The hoops competition involves tossing regulation basketballs through a hoop that moves sideways. That, too, spewed out tickets. We made out like bandits. After a few hours, we’d amassed about 4,000 tickets, which we were able to trade in for valuable goods. Continue reading →

“Let’s all go to the movies in Santa Fe to watch ‘Lincoln.’” The idea sounded great, until we discovered that all showings of that film, starring Daniel Day-Lewis had sold out, as in, “There will be no more tickets sold today, and probably not tomorrow.”

As much as we believe in keeping our dollars in Las Vegas, there are times, when considering a new car or watching a new movie, that such just isn’t possible.

Crestfallen, we returned home to wait until “Lincoln” might arrive here.

I still haven’t seen “Lincoln,” but I bought a DVD, at a price that didn’t cause me to take out a second mortgage. I’m waiting for my family to gather before we watch it at home.

There are also those kiosks at Walgreens and Wal-Mart that allow one to rent the movie. Perhaps someone will explain how they work, my never having used those machines. Continue reading →

Edward Albee got it absolutely right in his play, “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?” When one of George and Martha’s guests asked if she could use the restroom, George said to Martha, “Will you show our little guest to the — uh — euphemism?”

Euphemism? That’s the perfect word. It means “a mild or indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing.”

Even the word “restroom,” which is where the little guest wished to go, is a euphemism, a softening of the “real word,” toilet. Do people who go to restrooms have any intention of resting?

Anyone who’s traveled to Europe doubtless is convinced that those on the other side of the Atlantic don’t hesitate to use “toilet” to represent what it really is. Continue reading →

On the occasion of a birthday for one of us, my wife and I joined my sister Dorothy and her husband Joe Maestas for dinner at El Rialto. The rule in the Trujillo household is that the inviter pays for the invitee. And maybe that’s why we don’t invite others all that often.

But if we can inveigle one another to make the suggestion and turn it into an invitation, we’re willing. We’d almost finished our meal when the waitperson came by with the bill and took brother-in-law Joe’s credit card for processing.

At that moment, our long-time friend, Eddie Groth, entered, stopped by our åtable and said, “I would have been happy to buy your meal, but I see you’ve already taken care of it.”

Not 10 seconds later, the waitperson returned to our table to explain that somehow Joe’s card had been rejected. Those things happen; sometimes the card simply has to be swiped again. Continue reading →

Thumbing through the pages of a website called The Straight Dope, I came across a question that is totally relevant during May, the month of graduations.

Someone on the website asked, “Why is the alphabet in alphabetical order?” The reader adds, “Who decided A was the first letter, B was the second, and so on?”

Excellent questions. Check the dictionary for virtually any popular, western language, and you’ll find things pretty much in A, B, C, D order, whether the language be English, Spanish, Portuguese, German, French or any number of tongues that use characters resembling ours.

The question of the ordering of things takes me back to a long-lost Thanksgiving meal at our school, when I was in about the fifth grade. At that time, those who opted for the noon meal at school — and that was most of the student body — went to the cafeteria at Immaculate Conception School, and, naturally, got to line up alphabetically to partake of the turkey with all the trimmings. Continue reading →