\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Did Lawrence lust after Martha? He must have, since he as much as admitted it to his friend Roger. Or was Roger interested only in clear communication?
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m referring to the closing graphs of a recent column, in which Lawrence and Roger met in a nightclub and Roger asked Lawrence, “What do you think of Martha and I as a potential twosome?”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0And Lawrence replied, “Martha and me would be more like it.”<\/p>\n
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Lawrence was responding only to the grammatical aspects of Roger\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s question: Roger should have used “me” instead of “I,” in the same way that one wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t ever say, “What do you think of I?” It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a question of compound pronouns, not love-interests.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Whenever we use a pronoun with another element, usually a name, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s easy to forget grammatical agreement. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why we hear people say, “They gave the prize to she and I.” “She and I”? It would have to be “her and me.” Separate the elements if you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t believe it yet.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0The Martha passage is totally about grammar, using “I” and “me,” “very unique” and “feel badly.” In each case, Lawrence reacted to his friend\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s expressions, and he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t care a whit about Martha. So why does Lawrence ask his friend if Martha might be a little pregnant? Well one can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be a little pregnant; she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s gotta be either pregnant or not.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0And that was just a reaction to Roger\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s having said, “very unique couple.”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0“Unique” suffices; no need for any kind of modifier.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Well, the minute Work of Art was posted on the Optic\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s web site, I got a call from my sister Dolores, in San Francisco, asking me to walk her through it. “Frankly, I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get it,” she said.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0As soon as Lawrence said, “Martha and me would be more like it,” the entire passage implied Lawrence thought he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d be a better partner for Martha. Thus, because Dolores missed the very first attempt at correct grammar, the rest of the passage failed to make sense. And once I explained the grammatical aspects of the conversation, Dolores caught on. Having stumped her almost makes up for the times in our youth when she owned the only bike in the family and charged Park Place-type rentals to us have-nots.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0I wonder how many other readers got the impression there was a love affair in peril. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d feel badly \u00e2\u20ac\u201d er \u00e2\u20ac\u201d bad, if Roger and Martha were to break up over this.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u00a2
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0I left Wal-Mart levitating Thursday over a matter that had never come to mind for a third of a century ago.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Let me explain:
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0In 1973, we were headed down the Camp Luna hill toward town. We drove a Gremlin with a hatchback window, and our toddler, Diego in a buggy in the tire well. We stopped at the bottom of the hill, but the car behind us didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t, causing a crash that propelled our second-born to the front seat.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0A frightened teenaged girl with no insurance promised to pay for the damages to our car. As we were leaving the next week for Missouri, we needed for the repairs to get done fast. We paid our deductible, an obscene amount of $100, and had our own insurance company foot the bill.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Decades passed, and we forgot about the accident. But Thursday I made eye-contact with the same person, now a mature woman, who reminded me that I was the person she ran into, 33 years ago. “I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve felt bad for years. I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have insurance, and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll feel better if you let me give you a check,” she said.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0She wrote a check for $100. I told her the matter had long ago been set aside and (almost) forgotten, but she insisted. “I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll feel better.”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Not one to deprive her of feeling good, I accepted and also gave her a big hug, told her how proud I was of her and about how she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d made my day. That experience restored a lot of faith in humanity. I wish I could mention her name here, but she knows who she is.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Now, if only I could get others to settle their long-forgotten trespasses.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0There was a guy I couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t catch on foot because he was on my newly swiped 10-speed bike (this was my bike, not my sister\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s); and once, when I was parked behind the old SUB at Highlands, someone \u00e2\u20ac\u201d possibly a newly recruited gang member \u00e2\u20ac\u201d put a knife into the sidewall of my car; and someone damaged 16 feet of our fence by backing into it.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all come forward. Hear?
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u00a2
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Although I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m in my 60s, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve known a 15-year-old for about 50 years. Is this a permutation of modern math, some kind of algebraic puzzler? Actually, my friend and ex-colleague, Dorothy Simpson, is one of the rare people to have been born on Feb. 29, and thus has had only 15 birthdays.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Dorothy reacted to a recent Work of Art that referred to terms like “catywampus” and “all stove up,” as expressions that I thought were strange.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0In an email, Dorothy wrote that her late father, Clyde, used regionalisms that one doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t commonly hear: “Does anyone ever hear the word \u00e2\u20ac\u02dchodag?\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 What\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a \u00e2\u20ac\u02dchodag\u00e2\u20ac\u2122?”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0“I looked it up and discovered it is a mythical creature from the north woods of Wisconsin. That isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t how my mother [Audrey] used the word. She used it to mean an unkempt waif or ragamuffin. For example, if we wanted to go downtown, she would say, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcYou can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t go out in public looking like that!
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0You look like a little hodag! Wash your hands and face! Comb your hair! And put on clean clothes!\u00e2\u20ac\u2122”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0And Dorothy also mentioned “gee-hue,” about which she wrote, “My mother used some unusual words which she undoubtedly learned from her parents.
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0“[Mom] would always say when it was bitter cold outside, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcIt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s colder than “gee-hue!”\u00e2\u20ac\u2122”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0I have less trouble with “gee-hue” than with “hodag.” “Gee-hue,” I suspect, is a variation of “Jesus!” in the vein of “gee-zoo,” “geez” and “gee.”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t most such expressions people\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s ways of uttering a shocker without really appearing profane or obscene? When Walter Brennan of “The Real McCoys” would holler “gol-durn it,” wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t he really merely euphemizing a term we don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t use in polite company? He was, dang it!
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Interesting how people try to skirt profanity and obscenity by uttering sound-alikes. “Christ” has become “cripes,” and “hell” is now “heck.”
\n\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Does that mean that one who uses too many swear words is going to burn for eternity in heck?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0Did Lawrence lust after Martha? He must have, since he as much as admitted it to his friend Roger. Or was Roger interested only in clear communication? \u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m referring to the closing graphs of a recent column, in which Lawrence and Roger met in a nightclub and Roger asked Lawrence, “What do you think of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[2],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rezio.net\/woa\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}