Category Archives: Sarcasm

I am a tea partier. I believe in America. I believe in liberty. I believe in freedom. And I believe that these things are being taken away by sinister forces working to destroy American from within.

I am a tea partier. I believe in paying virtually no taxes, and yet somehow maintaining the greatest country in the world.

I believe it was fine to spend a trillion taxpayer dollars to invade and occupy a foreign country for bogus reasons, but I’ll be damned if I’ll stand for a trillion dollars being spent to stabilize the American economy or create American jobs. I’d rather see the American economy collapse than see my taxes go up.

I believe that living with laws that induce businesses to reduce how much energy they use or how much pollution they produce is exactly like living in a totalitarian regime.

I believe in liberty and freedom. Except the freedom to decide if or when to become a parent. Or the freedom to decide when and how to die. Or the freedom to marry the person who you love if I don’t like your preferences. Or the freedoms of Muslims to build places of worship. Or the freedoms of dark-skinned people to move around freely without having to show their immigration papers. All those things should be forbidden. But otherwise I believe in liberty and freedom.

I believe that “the environment” is an imaginary invention of radical leftists and therefore affects me in no way whatsoever, and never will. Read More →

We would say we’re sorry, but we’re not. We have our country, and you have yours. It’s not our fault that your country sucks. So nice try – trying to take our country away from us — but it’s not going to work. We’re going to beat you back across the border, whatever it takes, so you might as well get moving along now and make things easier for yourself.

Naturally, there are bleeding hearts here that constantly stick up for you. These are the same people that are determined to ruin our great country with tolerance, consideration, empathy, compassion, and a bunch of other stuff that can only lead to communism. These are the same people that say things like “this country was built by immigrants”, and “doesn’t the constitution say that all men are created equal and that we all have a right to pursue happiness?”

That’s just stupid. Everyone knows that what they meant was that all citizens are created equal. And even though it says “all”, they really meant all white citizens. That’s what they meant, but they didn’t feel that they had to spell it out because at the time America was all white, and they couldn’t imagine that it would ever become the way it is now.

The founding fathers never meant to include Mexicans, or blacks, or communists, gays, atheists, Muslims, or any of the other people that want nothing more than to destroy our country. These are the same people that elected Obama, and after we’ve run you out of the country, we’re going to run them out too. Read More →